Seed of Chucky (2004)

When can you tell that a horror franchise has run out of steam? When it begins spoofing itself. Much like “Scream”, much like “Halloween”, and, yes, much like my beloved “Friday the 13th” series. It’s safe to say that once a series has resorted to spoofing itself from the very beginning, you know its run out of ideas, and you just know its writers aren’t even trying, anymore. Mancini’s newest spin-off of the “Child’s Play” franchise is yet another sequel that takes every chance in saying “We’re stupid, and we know we’re stupid, so look how not stupid we are by pointing out how stupid this story is.”

Confusing, yes. Amusing? Not a single bit. I don’t want to watch a damn horror movie that lets me know “You’re watching a horror movie”. I didn’t like that when I watched the “Scream” films or any of the slew of slashers following that, so why would I watch “Seed of Chucky” for that? Doing something stupid and then pointing out how stupid it is does not make you any less stupid. I know, it’s confusing but think about it, and it doesn’t work with “Seed of Chucky”. It makes no attempt to take this concept and hopefully bring about a new direction with the franchise, it just continues driving it to the ground without any attempts at honest storytelling. And then it has a plot that’s so complicated, and with so many details than it has the right to. It attempts anxiously to mimic “New Nightmare” as a meta-sequel that’s a new installment,  but also a film separate to its preceding installments. Regardless of the fact, “Seed of Chucky” is terrible, and really stupid with a main character that is not even slightly likable to keep the audiences attentions.

Glen is a weird looking doll that really doesn’t hold the promise that the creators are keeping to keep this franchise alive. He’s a boring new character inserted to breathe new life, but there’s not a lot of life in this new creation. It seemed from the get go that the writers were so conflicted on this new character that they weren’t sure whether they were intent on making it a boy or a girl, so instead, they turned it in to a gender confused innocent presence who doesn’t really want to go in to his mother and father’s line of work, though the writers hint, for some reason, that he will become even more of a vicious psycho than his parents. Is this hint ever going to be realized, or is that being saved for future films? And why should I even watch this film if it’s only one big tease, and never gives the audience what its expecting? In the end, it’s one big gimmick of a movie, like an episode of a series promising a big surprise and then never delivering it.

Glen kills only three people during the course of the film, and most of his character’s time is spent trying to convince his parents not to kill. Meanwhile, the film is so self-aware, it becomes an embarrassing exaggerated caricature of itself. Glen/Glenda, an obvious reference to Ed Wood, is creepy, but only because he looks so much like Michael Jackson, and Chucky and Tiffany are downplayed for Glen’s own presence. “Seed of Chucky” was, without a doubt, one of the longest ninety minutes of my life. And “Seed of Chucky” truly fails on every length. The horror is bland, the characterization is lame, the performances are phoned in especially by Jennifer Tilly who spoofs herself… oddly, and the film’s idea of comedy is having two dolls karate fight, which I’m still uncertain if it was played for comedy or not. Safely speaking, it’s a very bad film that won’t save a franchise that’s already DOA. Just end it. For the love of god, just end it. Glen is not a compelling enough new character, Chucky and Tiffany are boring, and with this smug, unfunny, and self-aware horror comedy, it’s clear that the “Child’s Play” series is dead and buried. Give it a rest.

 

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