Despite not being the worst movie of 2007, there's no denying that "Transformers" was a clunky mess that had zero direction and almost little appeal beyond the target demographics: 1. People looking for robot smashing and 2. Megan Fox. Both of which were vastly over sold elements with little pay off, come the climax. While the second one does promise bigger, faster and better, Michael Bay's sequel almost works at not being fun. In fact most times I was left looking for reason to continue watching. From the dizzying half hour that included quick cuts and revolving cameras, most of which left me sick to my stomach and doubting if I could make it through the first hour let alone the entire movie. "Revenge of the Fallen" just flat out sucks all entertainment value from its film cell and leaves us with a mind boggling two hour long epic that takes us nowhere. Instead with the paper thin story we're given thoughts on terrorism, the cliché clandestine government calling for a ban on all of the autobots for fear of their power.

Saddest of all is that this still doesn't become the Transformer movie I was expecting. It slogs through the human characters for a majority of the story and then we're left with the giant robots, most of whom are merely props to stand around while Fox (who plays Mikaela) and Labeouf (who plays Sam) stroll around trying to figure out why the Decepticons want the All Star cube and they're just as confused as we are the entire time. "Revenge of the Fallen" is a clusterfuck of epileptic special effects, dialogue that sounds written by a twelve year old and an end product that is never sure if it wants to be taken seriously or as a tongue in cheek (read: The Jive Talking robots) action film. Whatever the intention it's an out of focus assault on the ears and eyes, and it's not an experience I'll be revisiting any time soon.