Virgins of Sherwood Forest (2000)

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Don’t you hate it when you hit your head in a fit of rage and end up in Sherwood forest with a bunch of hot buxom women? In all honesty, I’d love that, but surely enough in Surrender Cinema’s “Virgins of Sherwood Forest” you can expect it to happen. One of my favorite erotic stars of all time, Gabriella Hall, plays Roberta, a female director for a music video has to tolerate a bunch of obnoxious sex starved actors.
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V/H/S Viral (2014)

vhs-viralI think “V/H/S/ Viral” might prove to be a little too cynical for horror fans that love their anthology horror movies chaotic and somewhat over the top. “VHS 2” was a hard act to follow, and “V/H/S/ Viral” thankfully doesn’t try to top the previous films, so much as accompany it with a magnificent social commentary that tops off a pretty excellent trilogy, all things considered. If “V/H/S/ Viral” is the last in the Collective’s indie anthology horror film then it’s a marvel to end on, as “V/H/S/ Viral” is a sick and demented film about society’s unquenchable thirst for instant fame in a world where everything can be accessed with a button and a massive online world. “V/H/S/ Viral” is cryptic and often very confusing, but all roads converge in to the theme of fame.

Every story features some theme about characters seeking fame and paying the price for their hubris, while the wrap around segments this time involve a fame hungry young man who uses his camera in an almost addictive manner in hopes it will grant him some form of success. Despite having a beautiful supportive girlfriend, he only wants fame, and events spiral out of control when a high way chase results in his girlfriend being kidnapped, while random people begin committing suicide after viewing mysterious viral videos on their cell phones. The team of Gregg Bishop, Nacho Vigalondo, and Justin Benson and Aaron Moorehead accomplish some truly eerie and gory short horror stories, all of which revolve around the central commentary. More documentary than video footage, “Dante the Great” sets down on aspiring magician Dante, who accidentally comes across a magic cloak that can warp objects and commit amazing feats.

As its new owner becomes a worldwide celebrity, he discovers that the cloak’s powers are conscious and it will not grant him anymore feats unless Dante offers up sacrifices. Splicing in video footage, and interviews, the segment is gory and spooky with some rather fantastic special effects, all with a villain that’s enigmatic and terrifying. The final shot really sets the stage for the film. “Parallel Monsters” is a Spanish language segment involving a scientist named Alfonso who creates a doorway to a parallel world where he meets his mirror image double. The two at first garner a casual relationship and agree to switch worlds for fifteen minutes. As the pair explores their own realities, Alfonso discovers a terrifying secret behind his own, and tries to make it back home before his own world is tainted. Director Nacho Vigolando’s own installment is unusual, but has a great sense of humor with some creepy special effects.

I also love the final scene which mirrors the alternate reality in a more symbolic form. “Bonestorm” is the least entertaining of the trio as it feels like a more truncated version of “Safehaven” from VHS 2. A group of skateboarders are seeking fame by composing their own skate board video and head to Mexico to film their tricks. Little do they know their hidden skate park is actually a Satanic temple, and when one of the boarders falls spilling his own blood, carnage immediately ensues. Despite some excellent special effects, and a pretty slick final scene, “Bonestorm” just felt too much like “Safehaven” and matched with the obnoxious protagonists, it’s a pretty forgettable final segment. All in all, “VHS Viral” is a demented and creepy third leg in the acclaimed anthology series. While it does break the rules of its gimmick as a found footage film, it compensates with a very volatile and important reflection on the world’s hunger for fame at the cost of our own humanity.

V/H/S: Viral (2014)

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I think “V/H/S/ Viral” might prove to be a little too cynical for horror fans that love their anthology horror movies chaotic and somewhat over the top. “VHS 2” was a hard act to follow, and “V/H/S/ Viral” thankfully doesn’t try to top the previous films, so much as accompany it with a magnificent social commentary that tops off a pretty excellent trilogy, all things considered. If “V/H/S/ Viral” is the last in the Collective’s indie anthology horror film then it’s a marvel to end on, as “V/H/S/ Viral” is a sick and demented film about society’s unquenchable thirst for instant fame in a world where everything can be accessed with a button and a massive online world. “V/H/S/ Viral” is cryptic and often very confusing, but all roads converge in to the theme of fame.

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Vampirella (1996)

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It’s hard to believe almost twenty years ago, the height of superhero movies was “Batman & Robin” with studios not really clamoring to adapt any of the beloved superheroes. It took “Blade” to finally bring some tooth and maturity to the entire sub-genre. One of the more interesting precursors to “Blade” is the dreadfully boring vampire adaptation “Vampirella,” which is a tonally confused take on the pulpy pin up character mostly known for being beautiful and sexy, and not so much for her compelling story lines. “Vampirella” is never sure if it’s campy horror schlock, exploitative vampire softcore, or a stern horror epic. So director Jim Wynorski pretty much lunges for all three on the table, and comes out with this pretty gloomy and dull film.

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Vanishing on 7th Street (2010)

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I never thought I’d hate a post apocalyptic movie for being too grim and miserable. But surely enough one of the biggest downfalls of “Vanishing on 7th Street” is that it’s so downbeat it cuts off any chance of entertainment. I know that grim and hopeless moods come with tales about the end of the world, but director Brad Anderson almost has nothing to do with his premise and concept, thus he revolves his story around a series of very unlikable characters. It’s a shame considering director Brad Anderson is such a competent often brilliant director, but he’s behind the camera lensing what is an obviously incomplete movie.

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Veronica Mars (2014) [Blu-Ray]

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While “Veronica Mars” didn’t exactly set the world on fire, it’s definitely a return to form for the cast and crew behind the cult series, revived by the loyal fanbase and Kickstarter. Creator Rob Thomas sets the series right in the place he left off, providing a much wanted return to the universe where Veronica Mars is still a pariah and still always five steps ahead of everyone in her life. The best fans could have hoped for was that “Veronica Mars” felt like one big finale, and lo and behold, it succeeds two fold. I won’t pretend “Veronica Mars” is a spectacular thriller, but it’s a simple and entertaining closer to a series that deserved a decent send off.

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Virtual Encounters (1996)

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 It’s Skinemax time and “Virtual Encounters” is the movie for anyone interested in delightful mediocre mid-nineties porn. As a movie it’s a pretty crummy and boring attempt to add fantasy elements to a genre already built around fantasies. Part of the Surrender Cinema division from Full Moon, “Virtual Encounters” is pseudo-science fiction that basically just features a slew of mildly erotic sex scenes that have no real context to them. They’re just there to get about as much mileage out of the movie before it ends.

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Vampire on Bikini Beach (1988)

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Michael Headley: Dude this will be our big break!
Todd Kaufman: How do you figure?
Michael: Everyone loves vampire movies right now, so we could make our own!
Todd: Genius, dude!
Michael: But while the audience is watching the horror movie, we can perform some songs during the movie.
Todd: Geniuser, dude!
Michael: I mean they have to watch us perform, what else are they going to do? Press the forward button?

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