It (2017)

Andrés Muschietti’s “It” has proven in a year of really bad Stephen King adaptations, that it is very possible to put one of King’s most popular novels on screen and remind us once again why King is King. Muschietti, like Tommy Lee Wallace before him, has the daunting task of compressing an eleven hundred page novel in to what will end up being a five hour epic. Yet, “It” manages to come out mostly unscathed as a film that is both a spooky horror film and a stellar coming of age drama. Much like “Mama,” Muschietti’s work on “It” ends in a film that can be appreciated as a human drama and a pure horror movie packed with heart, scares, insight in to growing up in an unforgiving, cruel world.

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Survivor Type (2012)

So you saw “The Dark Tower” and were meh on it, but then you saw “IT” and were all over it.  As “Mr. Mercedes” is available for streaming and “Gerald’s Game” is coming soon, how else is a die hard Stephen King fan supposed to satiate their thirst, their need? Shorts, of course.  After watching tons of Stephen King short film adaptations, one of them stands out head and shoulders above the rest and every fan should make it a point to find it and see it.

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Five Essential Stephen King Movies, and Five You’re Better Off Avoiding

It’s a pretty interesting time to be a Stephen King fan, as 2017’s seen the emergence of King in almost all media. His works “It” and “The Dark Tower” are being adapted in to highly anticipated feature films, “The Mist” has been turned in to a series for better or for worse, and Scream Factory are re-releasing “Misery” on blu-ray later in the year for fanatics. With “The Dark Tower” coming to theaters very soon, I thought I’d ring in the occasion by highlighting five stellar Stephen King movies, and five you’re much better off avoiding.

What are some King adapted movies you think are worth watching, and what are some you think should be avoided? Let me know in the comments!

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Firestarter (1984): Collector’s Edition [Blu-Ray]

If there’s anything that Stephen King loves to write about, it’s powerful children with god-like abilities, and I imagine considering most of his stories connect in to a universe, someone with Danny Torrance’s abilities is married to someone with the abilities from “Firestarter.” Mike Lester’s adaptation of the Stephen King novel is not a masterpiece, but I still insist it’s a fun movie with a good amount of effort behind it. The only thing it really suffers from is being ahead of its time. I imagine were we given a new adaptation “Firestarter” might be a mix of dazzling and disturbing a la “Carrie.” As it is, “Firestarter” is mostly a compelling horror drama about another very powerful young girl who is being hunted by the government.

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Creepshow 2 (1987): Special Edition [Blu-Ray]

While “Creepshow 2” has always been taken as one of pair of horror movies that pay tribute to the golden age of EC Comics, over the years the horror community has learned to appreciate “Creepshow 2” as its own entity. Surely, its cut from the same cloth as the original classic, but it also carves out its own identity and doesn’t repeat the same beats as the original film. The Michael Gornick directed sequel is a darker, grittier, and more vicious follow up to what was kind of a raucous and darkly comic celebration, and it works. As a nostalgic memento, and as a sequel carved by Stephen King and George Romero, “Creepshow 2” is a classic in its own right.

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The Five Geekiest Guest Spots on “The Simpsons”

thesimpsonsgeeky2016 is just about done, thank goodness, and like last year, Fox cable channel FXX in America is hosting their “The Simpsons 600” marathon. Beginning on Thanksgiving day, they give 600 episodes of “The Simpsons” starting from episode one, and they’ve given every episode non-stop and completely uncut. This marathon has reminded me how much I adore “The Simpsons” and will always adore “The Simpsons” even when it’s at its lowest. Ninety five percent of the episodes from season one to season ten are brilliant and absolutely hysterical, while the other five percent being mediocre to forgettable episodes still end up being rather funny, offering at least two instances of chuckles here and there.

With the series nearing thirty record breaking seasons, I thought I’d fondly remember five of the best guest spots from celebrities popular among fan boys and fan girls alike. As always if you have your own choices, let me know in the comments!

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Carrie (1976): 40th Anniversary Collector’s Edition [Blu-Ray]

carrie-blu-rayWith the opening of “Carrie,” we see a brutal horror unfold with main character the titular Carrie White taking a shower during gym class and discovering the horror of her first period. She’s a girl who’s never really been given an explanation on anatomy or biology thanks to her religiously fanatical mother, and is terrified. Sadly the predators in her class that revel in bullying Carrie torment her by throwing tampons and towels at her as she screams. While the scene itself is jarring and the epitome of the cruelty Carrie inexplicably receives, it’s also the implication that ultimate evil has been realized. Though it’s mostly hinted at by Carrie’s mother, Carrie, despite being a good person at heart, is also pure evil personified.

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The Best Thing I’ve Seen in 2016

strangerthings1Netflix’s “Stranger Things” is the best thing I’ve seen all year. TV show, Movie, Web show, et al. The Duffer Brothers “Stranger Things” season one is eight episodes long at fifty five minutes each and it’s the easiest eight hours I’ve ever spent watching a series. There’s no filler, no flab, no pointless segues in to a sub-plot that wanders aimlessly. Every element of every episode is crucial and important and The Duffer Brothers have no time to fuck around.

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