Girls With Balls (2019)

Oliver Alfonso’s horror comedy is a movie that will likely be a very polarizing title down the line. For the people that actually bother to check it out on Netflix, “Girls with Balls” is a Z grade movie that walks the line between absolutely obnoxious, and admirably entertaining. I was mixed on “Girls with Balls” as it packed some great meaty horror comedy material, along with some woefully stupid moments and unlikable characters.

The constantly bickering all girls volley ball team The Falcons end up stranded in the middle of nowhere after their mini-van breaks down. After an incident with a bar filled with perverted men, they end up revealing themselves as degenerate hunters with a taste for human flesh. Chasing the girls in to the woods, they plan to hunt them down. Thus begins a very long night where they must run for their lives and test their team spirit. But the girls are more resourceful than it appears.

“Girls with Balls” is a mix of “The Descent,” “Wrong Turn,” and “Calvaire” with a Peter Jackson sensibility. Writers Alfonso and Jean Luc Cano seemingly concoct a narrative with clunky progression that never operates within much reason or logic. The girls end up at the wrong place at the wrong time, and seemingly piss off the wrong people. Thus begins their motivation to hunt them down for some peculiar reason rather than just murdering them. But then again this movie doesn’t adhere to logic too much as it most of the time clings to the over the top comedy and goofy gore. One scene even finds the girls striking back at their hunters with lethal volleys in their faces.

Sans the credits, “Girls with Balls” is barely seventy minutes in length, thus you can feel the writers struggling to build on the narrative. There’s a lot of pointless conflict that means nothing in the finale, heel turns injected for the sake of creating empty tension, and the climax doesn’t make a lick of sense. What was the point of these men? Were they cannibals? Were they inbred hillbillies? Did they hunt everyone that they crossed paths with? Did they hunt people for sport or as a sacrifice? In either case, “Girls with Balls” is a mixed bag that teeters on unwatchable, but is redeemed by some solid action, great gore, and the insanely sexy Manon Azem. If you check it out, go for the subtitles, as the English dub is embarrassing.

Now Streaming on Netflix in English Dub and Original Language w/ Subtitles.