Jeepers Creepers 3 (2017)

The definition of disappointing is the big lead in to who or what the Creeper is. The writing makes a big deal about how you’re able to read its origins by touching a severed part of it, even staging a scene where a group of people channel its origins. There’s a close up of its magical spears and emphases on its car which is built like a virtual indestructible tank, and in the finale Creeper wails in anger as crows fly around, reacting to a sign that reads “We know what you are.” Guess what? We’re never told what the Creeper is. There isn’t even a hint of an explanation. The writing tries to cop out by metaphorically explaining that the creeper is a monster that changes and destroys lives. Damn it, to hell with stupid clichés and tell me what the hell the Creeper is!

Why is it angry that they know what it is? Does it have a name? What is it hiding? Is it a demon? Was it human once? Why does it prefer mostly male victims? Does it feed on animals, too? Who the hell built the tank for it? Why does the creeper have immense knowledge in building a virtual war weapon to hunt and store his victims? Why would an immensely strong, fast, and vicious monster with the ability to regenerate even need a tank in the first place? That’s like making Superman ride around in a Jaeger. It’s redundant bordering on incredibly stupid. Why does it like music? Can we still tell where it is by hearing “Jeepers Creepers” on the radio?

“Jeepers Creepers 3” never answers a single question, only creating more and more moments where we’re forced to sit baffled at what is happening. And we’re expected to settle on this third installment on the basis that there just may be another movie or maybe a series? I doubt the Creeper is worth a series. He was an okay one and one horror monster, but the attempts at world building have turned it from a mystifying beast in to a silly often laughably over powered horror villain. Even the Xenomorphs and Yautja’s have their vulnerabilities, but in this third film, the Creeper lays waste to literally everyone, barely breaking a sweat. The film feels so hastily assembled with its timeline set between parts one and two, and works more on bridging the story in to part two, than focusing on the narrative we’re spending time on.

Rather than propping characters that have to fight for survival, the premise this time establishes and knocks off a lot of really dumb characters that are simply nothing more than cannon fodder. What’s more is that the only compelling character in the whole series sports a measly cameo, while the entirety is focused on broadly drawn and boring vengeance soaked protagonists. For such a long wait, “Jeepers Creeper 3” is an utter disappointment that props itself up as the defining film in the series that gives us answers, and cops out left and right. For fans that have boycotted the film based on director Victor Salva’s past crimes, you’re not going to miss anything but a monotonous sequel lacking in the menace and mystique the original film embraced.

  • Yes. I started watching and had to stop halfway through due to other issues, but so far not so good. It is so jumbled. Seems like the 23 years in between killings is a real problem for the writer, you know, the person who made up that rule. Ugh. Will finish, but probably won’t ever rewatch.